Kids Say the Darndest Things: Episode 53

Me: “Good grief, that’s a stinky bottom, Dominic!”
Dominic: “Yessssss.”
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Dante: “What is that?”
Me: “Meat.”
Dante: “You mean cow?”
Me: “Yes.”
Dante: “Is it dead? Did they kill the cow?”
Me: “Of course it’s dead! They didn’t cut it off the cow while it was alive.”
Dante: “I’m not eating that.”
I wonder if he would eat it if the cow was still alive . . .
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I brought Dominic in from having a bath.
Dorian: “Hi, Dominic, did you have a good bath? Mama, did he cry?”
Me: “No, he was happy tonight.”
Dorian: “Good job, Dommy! I like to hear that you weren’t crying.”
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Me: “What is Dominic doing?”
Dante: “Cooking.”
Ummmm . . .
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Dante: singing a favorite song with “butt” and other choice words replacing the real words.
Me: “Dante, that’s enough. We only use those words in context.”
Dante: “Why are you raining on my parade?”
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Dorian: “I think I’m full so let’s go straight to the zoo and no waffles.”
Dante: “I want waffles!”
Dorian: “Dante, it’s MY birthday. If I say waffles, we have waffles. If I say no waffles, we don’t eat waffles. That’s how it works on your birthday.”
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Dorian: “Dominic is eating Dante’s cake.”
Me: “What? Can you take it away, please? He’s going to choke.”
Dorian: “Um, well, he kind of already finished it.”
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Irving: singing “Do you like waffles?”
Dante
: “Yeah, we like waffles!”
Irving: “Do you like pancakes?”
Dante: “Yeah, we like pancakes . . . but I like waffles more. Can we go get some waffles?”

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